Tuesday, December 05, 2006

Chapter XXVII: In which we witness an internal dialogue


Fearful Mel: I wanna paint like I am free as a bird, like Emily Mason, Elaine Daily-Birnbaum or Katherine Chang-Liu, Joanne Last, or Peter Alberice.


Confident Mel: Well then why don't you?


Fearful Mel: Because I am afraid people will think I have no ability.


Confident Mel: Oy! So what do you care what people think?


Fearful Mel: Um, well, I guess I do care.


Confident Mel: So you are going to let what people may think prevent you from doing what you really want to do?


Fearful Mel: Sounds pretty stupid doesn't it?


Confident Mel: Stupid isn't the half of it. Pitiful! Since you can't control what people think, what can you control? The answer is you can make yourself happy and paint the way you want.
You could always keep it off the blog.


Fearful Mel: O I couldn't do that! I gotta see it on the blog. It's what I do to make it come alive.


Confident Mel: Just pitiful.



Burst


Burst

Acrylic on gallery wrapped canvas

36x36"



Detail

Finally, I let go of the fears and let my brushes have full sway. I am flying high now. This is the breakthrough I wanted to make. I then continued to paint and made this series of seven small works, all 5x7" which I will share only these three today.

Landscape

collage, pencil, acrylic on acid free mat board, 7x5"


Orbit Series #8

Acrylic, ink, pencil on 100% rag Arches watercolor paper, 7x5"

Cruciform

Acrylic, pencil, pen on acid free mat board, 5x7"


I like this one so much I made this detail my desktop picture. All the pencil lines were added afterwards, with my non-dominant hand, the left one.

+++++

Mapping

Acrylic with gel pen and prismacolor pencils on 100% rag Arches Watercolor paper, 16x12"

Painted in June 2002! I got this one out of the archives to compare with current work and because it needed framing.

Monday dawned bright and sunny and we decided to venture out for some Christmas decoration inspiration. First stop, our home away from home, IKEA. They think like we do, and I also wanted to see if they had some affordable frames. I hit the jackpot!



These came with the perfect matting and glass and hanging devices. I am delirious! (Sorry about that flash on the center painting).

And then these three got framed too. No more worrying about what I will do to finish my works. The frames also come in birch and white wood too. It has always been a dilemma for me to have to hand over my work to a framer, and wait and hope it will be worth the cost. Honestly this was a big reason why I went to quiltmaking...no frames!

In conclusion, if you are still even reading, I am pleased to be able to attack a canvas, with juicy paint, big brushes and abandon, and have it come out looking like my heart's desire.

22 comments:

  1. They are gorgeous! No text yet... can't wait to read about them later. You sure are up early!

    ReplyDelete
  2. Anonymous7:52 AM

    These are wonderful, especially Cruciform. Great job, letting go! (I still like Orbits...:)

    Becky

    ReplyDelete
  3. I live thru you vicariously. I am WAY to timid to attempt to create what's in my mind's eye. I have confidence on the outside, but not on the inside.

    Yeah, I'm working on that too, lol.

    ReplyDelete
  4. You must be doing the happy dance-I am...for you!!

    ReplyDelete
  5. Oh, Yes!! My heart leaped when I scrolled down to 'Burst'....it's so alive. Orbit #8 looks like it's leaping for joy. What a watershed of work! You must be thrilled.

    And to quote Mr. Beeb from 'Room with a View'...,"If only she lived as she plays Beethoven. It would be very exciting for all of us!" Now I know you're not playing piano, but you have very publicly fought old ghosts and it's cathartic for your readers too.

    ReplyDelete
  6. Wow, oh Wow Melody.

    Tell that (I've heard it called "monkey voice" and I like that image) -- Tell that screechy monkey voice to go eat a banana! Your work is fab -- and I love the new one a lot -- much less structure. I think how you feel about it is much more important than how OTHERs feel about it. You GO girl!

    Tam

    ReplyDelete
  7. Zowieee!!! Glad you shared the inner dialogue...and proceeded to fly with your own wings!! FABU!!

    ReplyDelete
  8. Quote of the Day
    Action is the foundational key to all success.
    Pablo Picasso


    Picasso would be proud of you!

    ReplyDelete
  9. Anonymous11:06 AM

    Absolutely Fabulous!
    Burst is my favorite -- if I had to choose, that is.
    Keep sharing your inner discussions & the resulting art, as we all Thrive on it, (especially those among us who blogging on our own yet).

    truly, Cathy W. in Houston

    ReplyDelete
  10. Now you're cooking! Look forward to more of this "loose" painting.

    No lines made the color juicy. Nice

    ReplyDelete
  11. Janice12:11 PM

    unbelievably, ridiculouly, fabulous!!

    I've admired your work and your blog for a long time, but I must tell you, something clicked today and I'm suddenly inspired to stop thinking/planning and to "just do it." Gotta go . . . bye . . . oh, yeah, THANK YOU!

    Janice in Camas

    ReplyDelete
  12. YES!!!

    BTW, both of your e-mails are bouncing.

    ReplyDelete
  13. I am in love with "Burst". Gorgeous!

    ReplyDelete
  14. I love orbit #7 and 8 and Burst. They are the freeist and most interesting. Why to go.

    ReplyDelete
  15. You're fabulous Melody, and so are your paintings. A real inspiration!

    ReplyDelete
  16. BEAUTIFUL! I think you found your freedom with these. Loose, vibrant and alive. way way wonderful. I find that I too am quite taken with Burst. And what a great find on the frames! I loved the dialog with fearful and confident Mel. Why oh why do we do that to ourselves? When we jump past the fear (of what,rejection? please..really, why do we care!)we can find all sorts of amazing adventures that await us.

    ReplyDelete
  17. (whispering to Fearful Mel) ... or you could take a baby step and create another blog but keep it private. Then you could still view it "out there" but not quite as "out", and THEN take the full step of showing eveyone. Some dragons are better slain by stealth and bit-by-bit, than by all-out charging. (Or am I just speaking to myself here?)

    ReplyDelete
  18. Wow, you sure got a lot of feedback on your breakthrough. I know that must pump you up.

    You know, it really LOOKS like you had a breakthrough! I am jumping up and down with you.

    What next?

    ReplyDelete
  19. WTG!!!
    I am watching your progress with the interest of one who hears the same internal ruckus about my painting. I congratulate you on your decision to take action!

    ReplyDelete
  20. Anonymous8:31 AM

    You really should get therapy

    ReplyDelete
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Hello,
So nice of you to drop by. I love your comments, and if you would really like a reply, please email me at fibermania at g mail dot com