The Real End of Hoop Jumping
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I just read Gabrielle's blog about judging at Paducah and she showed pictures of some of the winners and that KNOT in my stomach formed again.
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O I know I have a penchant for making huge pronouncements (see: It has all become clear to me!!!) but they usually fade like a fart in the wind, and I forget that I ever thought that way, or made that declaration.
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But looking at those pictures of the winning quilts really solidified for me that I have ended the need to out-do, to reach for the gold, to stand on my head, to squeeze out of my creative juices one more senselessly overdone exhibitionist type quilt.
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I wanna enjoy the process. I wanna be happy with the product. I wanna relax when I am in a room where it is displayed. I want to feel a peace and a warmth and a teeny thrill come over me when I look at it hanging.
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I don't want to have to live up to my last best piece.
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Going to a quilt show is difficult for me these days. Either the work is great and it makes me feel bad or the work is bad and it makes me feel bad.
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The worst though is when I see work that is made just to win the money.
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As a viewer, I feel manipulated. I know and understand the effort it took. It is the fudge sauce, the whipped cream, the cherry, the sprinkles and then the airbrushed sparkels, which make it all so inedible.
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And what's worse, is that I know all too well the motivation. I have been there. I have done that. I have won that.
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Of course it was in the dark ages when things were simpler, and all you needed to win were the meager tricks in my bag. But one knows that manic feeling of pushing the envelope, of adding one more thing on top to KILL the judges and get that ribbon!
So since I said it before, earlier this year and I still feel it, I guess it is really going to stick this time.
NO MORE hoop jumping quilts for this girl.
This just in! Marcia Derse has begun a website!!! Take a look here
That's very grown up.
ReplyDeleteThank you Rian, it's about time, no?
ReplyDeleteI want to know how you make a quilt just to win money. I am clueless - I guess that is a good thing!!
ReplyDelete"I don't want to have to live up to my last best piece."
ReplyDeleteThis must be the quote of the day!
I felt tired just reading about your itinerary, hope you have a very good productive and fun trip.
I guess this is why, up until now, I have never entered anything. I can't create unless I feel creative!!
ReplyDeleteI just took two pieces in to be framed for the West MI Art Show. When I finished quilting "Loon Dance" I looked and briefly thought "should I add some bead work to look like water droplets?? Then I stood back and lookd at it again. Nope, no beads. It was not all fur-frued up and it was clearly DONE. Whew. If it gets in, great. If not...their loss. I love it.
As for you- Melody, you haven't had anything to prove to anybody (except, maybe yourself) for years. Trust me....no matter what you do there are plenty of us ooohhhing and ahhhhing and loving every fused little bit of it!!
teri
Is it possible, that some people, still need to make quilts or art, 'just to win the money' - as in, pay the bills, eat, etc.
ReplyDeleteAmen to your resolve. Create from the heart for the heart. It's all that counts.
ReplyDeleteMel's resolve is wonderful and she is doing what she wants to do & she has worked long and hard to get there...maybe the other people who need to 'make the money' would love to be in the same boat...
ReplyDeleteAh, how I wish I COULD make things for money - if I had any idea of how to do that! However, I make what moves me and what I feel moved to make, and no doubt will continue to do so. I just hope that somewhere along the line,, other people will want to pay me for my art.
ReplyDeleteI agree that "I don't want to live up to my last best piece" is a very intense quote. I feel you there, Melody. Maybe it's painters that feel this way. Who knows. I always have anxiety when I'm done with something fabulous because I know that I will never again create anything as marvelous. Of course, I seem to. You also seem to. Many seem to. It's part of our process, the angst and getting over the hump and then being joyful and creating the work.
ReplyDeleteI would guess that work created specifically to win often times is devoid of any emotion. Usually, when I don't get a visceral reaction to something that my brain KNOWS is really good, it has been created specifically to win. People who are soley concerned with technique can really appreciate this way of creating. Me, I likes me a little bit of passion. Who cares if it wins. I'm lying...we all like to win. But, I wouldn't not make something just because it may not win. Most of us just make our stuff and find a place for it. What do I know, though.